When Julie Zhou became a Silicon Valley executive at the age of 25, she didn’t find any elation in being at the top of the food chain: rather, she felt as if she was stuck at the bottom of a deep, dark pit. We’ve all been there, feeling a lack of confidence at work and like we don’t deserve that position. Insecurity can spiral through our heads and make us question every decision we make and every assignment we complete.
Years later, Zhou found a way to rediscover her confidence and get herself out of that pit, even though at some point it felt impossible. Here are the three main tips she applied to beat those negative feelings and get back on track.
Don’t beat yourself up for feeling bad
One of the worst parts of losing all confidence is struggling with something and worrying about the fact that you’re struggling with it. Why is this even hard for me? It can be hard not to listen to your internal critic. The reality is that everyone in the world goes through hard times, and you must give yourself permission to worry. Don’t pay the double tax on your mental load.
Reconsider your narrative
The stories we tell ourselves from a few scant pieces of evidence are often flat-out wrong when we’re short of confidence. Nine times out of 10 the other person is not out to get you. Your coworkers don’t think you’re an idiot. And, yes, you do deserve this job.
When a negative story takes hold of you, step back and question whether your interpretation is correct. Are there alternative views you’re not considering? What can you do to seek out the truth? Once you take the steps to really find out the truth, you’ll probably see you were overthinking it all.
Close your eyes and visualize
Brain imaging studies show that when we picture ourselves doing something, we engage the same parts of our brain as if we were actually doing that activity. Therefore, this simple exercise tricks our minds into getting some of the benefits of an activity we have yet to do and can help our outcomes. All this from the comfort of your own head!
Everyone struggles with confidence at some point in their lives, check out this article for more ways to promote your self-confidence.